I had hoped and to start this new series of my blog earlier, but as I mention later, just to use the bathroom can be a challenge, let alone finding time to sit at my computer to blog. And when I do have a moment when my little girl is sleeping, the house and laundry seem to call my name to bring back some sense of order in the chaos. But here we go…
The transition to parenthood was tougher then I anticipated. One dreams of snuggles, coos, giggles, and a baby resting peacefully on your chest. What one doesn't even begin to imagine, let alone dream about, are endless squirminess, poop, reasonless crying, poop, lack of sleep, poop….did I mention poop?
All of sudden it's not about "me" anymore. Having a child takes every ounce of selfishness you may have, and flushes it down the toilet. Speaking of toilets, even something simple, like using the bathroom, takes planning and coordination. It's amazing how one can go from needing a solid 8 hours of sleep just to function the next day, to rejoicing when you can get a couple solid 3 hour chunks and feel like a new woman when you do. This is God's grace on us, to adapt and survive and still smile on the other side of it. :) To get to know this little person, to understand their needs and respond accordingly, takes hard work and dedication, but it's such a joy and all it takes is one little smile to forget the frustration you were feeling mere moments before. God is good.
9 weeks ago our life was, in a moment, changed forever. Lalaith Elizabeth Werezak entered our lives and, life as we knew it flew out the window. It's true, it was love at first sight, but within the first night, when your new baby just wants to suckle, cry, and poop, you soon find yourself slowly receding into a state of shock as the realization hits you: You have a baby now. Gone are the long nights of uninterrupted sleep, gone are your moments of free time, no more can you come and go as you please, when you please, for as long as you please. What have we done?
This then is followed by a new day, which brings new waves of wonder and love for this little one laying in your arms. That first day is huge. You're sharing your little miracle with friends and family and beginning to become acquainted with their little personality. Then the second night hits even harder, with even less sleep causing you and your husband to find yourselves revisiting the option of a pacifier. You may go into child birth with the notion that you do not, by any means, want a pacifier for you baby. Yet by four in the morning, you find yourself bordering on delirium as your baby continues to cry for no seemingly logical reason, and before you know it, your new bundle has a soother in their mouth and your catching a few well deserved moments of peace and quiet and sleep. It's amazing how ideas change the moment your baby enters the world and reality hits you like a deer loitering on highway 1.
In our society, we are bombarded with books, educational videos (most apparently from the early 1990's), the internet, others' unsolicited advice, and anything else we can get our hands on, all of which tell us the secrets of how to raise perfect children who never cry, sleep at night, and feed every 4 hours. The missing factor: Our children are all individuals and thus there can be no formula. This thing called "parenthood" is a learning curve, a massive learning curve. The largest we could possibly encounter, and we need to figure it out for ourselves. This is something that occurs over again with each new child, as they are all unique. They will all feed at different times, have their growth spurts at differing times, start teething at different ages, walking, talking etc. There's no logic to any of it, so as a new parent, I'm learning to just go with the flow. Do I still ask for advice here and there from those who have traversed this road ahead of me? Absolutely. Do I research and read up on things I don't know? In a heart beat. But I also know to allow for some flexibility and use some common sense too. That's what makes this ride as a parent much easier. Sarcasm also helps :)
All in all, though the transition from 2 to 3 can be abrupt, crazy, and a wild ride, I've also found it to be inspiring, rewarding, and the most amazing gift. Being a mommy is the single greatest thing, next to being a wife, and there's nothing I would rather be doing in this moment. I thank God for my little latte, fall more and more in love with her everyday, can't seem to get enough kisses, and am learning a whole lot more of myself in the process and God is teaching me the value of patience and grace. I have to relax and take one day, and night, at a time.
Having a child is a truly grand transition indeed.
sleeping beauty
sleepy snuggles with mommy
hanging out
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